Category Archives: Marriage

Marriage

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The Sit-down

The Sit-Down 
One of the greatest of deliberations is the one between a father and a potential suitor,

For he's actually considering giving up his daughter to a man that may treat her good or abuse her;

As men, we take this for granted because we want what we want, whether she's a Nailah or Haneefah,

Some will even portray a facade that's incorrect for that Asiya or Khadijah.  
The problem is that we were the one's who nurtured these girls from since they were young,

These fools don't know that the phone calls we get from our Banaat at times makes us want to go pull out a gun;

We love our daughters as equally as we love our sons,

But the role of the wali is the protection against those who are only looking for fun.  
Some men are out and about like predators looking for a virgin type,

Or a pretty face on a female who they can call a wife;

They never take into account that these women have feelings and are humans who only want that things are done right,

They want a muslim husband for this and the next life. 
No, I'll check your background, once, twice and even maybe a third time,

I want to see how your last marriage fared, not just see if you've been convicted of a crime;

Are you currently working at this present time,

And can you afford to take care of this daughter of mine. 
Truth be told, the Muslim female is more precious than gold,

The future of this Ummah is not to be sold;

Choose a man that's righteous for her whether young or old,

Or you may regret how you were lax with your noble position as your scrolls become unfold. 
Deliberations take time, like when a person is on trial in court,

So why wouldn't you think that this situation is more important that the trial of one who's accused of trying to unlawfully enter a vault?

No, actually it's more serious than that, more than a man charged for assault,

For this man who comes to your door doesn't realize that the scrutinizing of him must be done because if he has the wrong Islaam he'll cause destruction to everything that she was taught. 
So please, let's not just look at you with the white thoub and the Maa Sha Allaah, yaa akhi,

Or how you conveniently comb your beard sitting with your calm demeanor for me to see;

How often do you go to the masjid and who are your companions is what I must keep a tally,

Your actions are behind you and it will be checked, and the report may come back for you or against you as salaatul istakhaarah is done eventually. 
Once she marries you, she becomes like your captive,

I'd like you to be of those who not only know where the masjid is, but inside it you're presently active;

I know you may get mad from time to time and may get mad at her to the point you may say a word that may cause issues to her feelings or may cause some damage,

But I am always trying to work on my Islaam, so don't feel any way that if you put your hands on her viciously, that I turn beast-mode and treat you like I'm a savage. 
So please understand where my mind is in relation to my women,

This word women is not only for my wives, but it also includes my daughters and potential grandchildren;

But I am serious in what I said and the actions I am prepared to do and fully willing,

Also you should be mindful of any potential brother that you request to marry their daughter, because you'd rather be her hero than to play the role of the villain. 

Asadullah Abu Muwahhid At-Tarinidadi 

Polygyny Matters

Polygyny Matters
Indeed to some, only polygyny matters,

While others may say that only monogamy matters;

It doesn’t matter how many boyfriends she’s had in her life, cause only monogamy matters,

But this poem is solely about polygyny matters. 

“Does it really matter”, she says, “how many boyfriends I have had before I got married?”

“The real problem lies in muslim men having more than one wife, cause that’s plain greed, I must say, sadly”;

I mean, the emphasis isn’t really in being right for your husband so you can be happy,

Because so many men has experienced you before him unlawfully, that made your Creator angry. 

Today a woman can “deal” with a man having a lady in his life as well as her, and she’s called a side chic,

Other women actually look for a married man, whether he’s poor or rich;

The excuse is because they feel like he’s with a stable woman and he won’t be too clingy with them, which is sick,

But these same women take their shahadah, and form a new stance disliking polygyny, and defending monogamy real quick. 

A woman wants to know why does the men want another wife in the first place?

Didn’t Allaah say He created the desire for women in us, so pay attention if you’re awake;

The scholars say that the foundation of marriage as Allaah mentioned in Surah Nisaa is polygynous for any who’d like to debate,

And Allaah said the Prophet is the one with the best example to follow, and he also was in a polygynous marriage, at any rate. 

No, please, stop the foolishness, the first wife’s permission is not needed in order for him to take on another,

Allaah already gave him permission to do so if he meets a certain criteria;

Some sisters want to control the whole situation and interpret the Qur’aan, the Speech of Allaah,

Just ask the Ulemaa since you don’t know and play your position, sister. 

Oh, you thought I would let you slide, oh brother who’s lacking,

May Allaah forgive us for trying to take on another wife as we oppress ourselves and our sins are stacking;

Can’t afford the one you’re with, but it’s sit down after sit down as the Shaytaan is laughing,

Cause you’re jumping off a roof first without a parachute, then you want to figure out about your landing. 

Your criteria for marriage is not as strict as what you would want for your own daughter,

You want a potential brother to come correct, but your application of Islaam is softer;

Be careful who you bring into your home, so don’t forget salaatul istakhaarah,

And never lie or play games when you speak to these imaam or these sisters’ fathers. 

Polygyny is beautiful when it’s done correctly,

A chance to increase the muslim ummah, when you’re practicing Islaam strongly,

More chances for women young or old, with kids or without to get a husband who would stand up with them boldly,

So stop feeling like polygyny is the new form of sampling new women every so often my brother, as some brothers are doing “discreetly”. 
Asadullah Abu Muwahhid At-Tarinidadi

Those who leave off the Maghrib Prayer to break their fast

❌Those Who Leave The Maghrib Prayer in Congregation Due to Breaking the Fast:
The Noble scholar Shaykh Salih al-Fawzaan (حفظه الله) said: 
✳“Here, there’s a matter which is a must that attention brought to, and it is that some of the people sit at the table where a person’s fast is broken, have dinner and leave off praying Maghrib in congregation in the Masjid. As a result of that, the person commits a great mistake, and it is staying back from praying (the Maghrib) in congregation in the Masjid. He causes himself to miss out on a magnificent reward and subjects himself to the punishment (of Allaah). That which is legislated for the person fasting is that he first breaks his fast, then he goes (to the Masjid) for the prayer, then afterwards he has his dinner.” 
📘[Mulakh-khas al-Fiqhee V. 1 Pg. 381]

What?

What?

What do you really want, when you have a woman in your corner that’s covering?

Outside? Well, you act like you can’t help yourself, cause all you do is perfect that reckless eyeballing. 

You claim you want to have better character in your home, but you’re really stalling, 

Because if your partner’s on point and reminds you of Allaah, then who’s left to answer the Shaytaan’ calling? 
Some of these brothers pick up a lot of weights and only care about reps and sets,

They spend a lot of time beautifying their bodies, but can’t take care of their wives by curling a wallet and paying the rent;

If they were track runners, they’d be sprinters, after a little while they’re spent,

Never able to stick it out for the longevity, only that he came and when there’s problems, he left.
Yeah, you like the way she looks and her body pleases you? 

From her beautiful hair and how them jeans are fitting, too? 

It’s easier to do sin than to do what your Lord calls you to do?

Be cautious of that day you may be questioned about things you did in the open as well as in secret, too. 
Personally, I think that the Muslim female has been given a bad rap, if you ask me, 

The one’s who are a single wife, or who may have one co-wife , or two or three;

Because the media paints her as this oppressed little girl who is the opposite of how a true woman aught to be, 

However she only follows the commands of the One True Creator, that’s where she gets this most hated Islaamic Personality.  
So what do you do when you have a choice to make? 

A candy wrapped in paper and clean, or the dirty one that fell on the floor, which one will you take? 

You can’t be mad at the names they call these females, like hoes, and easy because she’s promiscuous on the first date, 

Because these adjectives are already known, so to indulge in the actions themselves clearly shows that in their labelling she’s willing to partake.  
I promote marriage and I promote the Muslim woman, so I guess I promote marriage to one as well, 

So if you don’t have one then I guess you bumped your head in the process when you fell;

I am a big advocate when she wears that black, and I know you can clearly tell, 

Be true to your life in this deen of Islaam and choose the muslimah and avoid the one who ascribe herself like Jezzebel. 
Not to say that the disbelieving woman can’t be chaste, that is not what I’m saying, 

For the good character of which I speak about is in her heart and on her limbs that she’s displaying;

She’s called a disbeliever because she doesn’t believe in the Only King that is truly reigning, 

And if she doesn’t believe in Him for real, and you choose her, then who you’re really fooling? 
Abu Muwahhid Asadullah At-Tarinidadi 

Husband

Husband 
I heard you’re having issues finding a husband these days, yaa ukhti,

Of all the husbands you had, were any of them truly Salafi?

Did they display the righteous characteristics of Talha, Umar or Salman Al Farsi?

And were you diligent enough to make sure that their backgrounds were checked thoroughly?
Everyone gets thirsty from time to time, and these times are only for us to drink water,

Cause we might run to get married and end up single with a son or a daughter;

I can’t stress enough the importance of doing salaatul istakhaarah,

As well as looking at the signs if you should even marry this brother.  
Or have you penalized any future brother because of the wrongdoing of another?

 You still hold a grudge, like you want to put a knife to a jugular?

Upset cause you had wanted to really leave him, but he was way ahead of yuh?

Well those days are gone with better brothers that are ahead of yuh?
Ever thought to ask the One Who’s the Creator of the soul?

To provide you with one who fits the mold;

Or at least close to it, if I should be so bold,

That could be with you today as you’re young, and tomorrow when you get old.
I know, it’s sad when you think about it, how some of these brothers fit,

Into a relationship that’s not even legit;

With a female that’s religiously sick,

Him choosing her over you, you may not realize it, but to you it was a benefit. 
So don’t give up hope, because there are good muslims out there,

Not just about themselves, but about you they’ll also care;

Jannah would be his goal and his attire, all Islaamic wear,

He would have no love for this dunya, and entering the Hell Fire he’d truly fear.

Asadullah Abu Muwahhid At-Tarinidadi