One of the greatest of deliberations is the one between a father and a potential suitor,
For he's actually considering giving up his daughter to a man that may treat her good or abuse her;
As men, we take this for granted because we want what we want, whether she's a Nailah or Haneefah,
Some will even portray a facade that's incorrect for that Asiya or Khadijah.
The problem is that we were the one's who nurtured these girls from since they were young,
These fools don't know that the phone calls we get from our Banaat at times makes us want to go pull out a gun;
We love our daughters as equally as we love our sons,
But the role of the wali is the protection against those who are only looking for fun.
Some men are out and about like predators looking for a virgin type,
Or a pretty face on a female who they can call a wife;
They never take into account that these women have feelings and are humans who only want that things are done right,
They want a muslim husband for this and the next life.
No, I'll check your background, once, twice and even maybe a third time,
I want to see how your last marriage fared, not just see if you've been convicted of a crime;
Are you currently working at this present time,
And can you afford to take care of this daughter of mine.
Truth be told, the Muslim female is more precious than gold,
The future of this Ummah is not to be sold;
Choose a man that's righteous for her whether young or old,
Or you may regret how you were lax with your noble position as your scrolls become unfold.
Deliberations take time, like when a person is on trial in court,
So why wouldn't you think that this situation is more important that the trial of one who's accused of trying to unlawfully enter a vault?
No, actually it's more serious than that, more than a man charged for assault,
For this man who comes to your door doesn't realize that the scrutinizing of him must be done because if he has the wrong Islaam he'll cause destruction to everything that she was taught.
So please, let's not just look at you with the white thoub and the Maa Sha Allaah, yaa akhi,
Or how you conveniently comb your beard sitting with your calm demeanor for me to see;
How often do you go to the masjid and who are your companions is what I must keep a tally,
Your actions are behind you and it will be checked, and the report may come back for you or against you as salaatul istakhaarah is done eventually.
Once she marries you, she becomes like your captive,
I'd like you to be of those who not only know where the masjid is, but inside it you're presently active;
I know you may get mad from time to time and may get mad at her to the point you may say a word that may cause issues to her feelings or may cause some damage,
But I am always trying to work on my Islaam, so don't feel any way that if you put your hands on her viciously, that I turn beast-mode and treat you like I'm a savage.
So please understand where my mind is in relation to my women,
This word women is not only for my wives, but it also includes my daughters and potential grandchildren;
But I am serious in what I said and the actions I am prepared to do and fully willing,
Also you should be mindful of any potential brother that you request to marry their daughter, because you'd rather be her hero than to play the role of the villain.
Asadullah Abu Muwahhid At-Tarinidadi